Football leagues in Sunderland

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Last updated: 11 May, 2008 | Next game: Washington Colliery at Albany Park on the 14th May 6:30pm kick off.

Hylton CW 2 Sassco.co.uk 2.
Both teams "ring" in the changes.



Due to the lack of a camera for the day, above are two brief video shots of the game.

A very tired end of season run in. We were drastically short. The missing list was quite scary:

Mark Middlemiss
Tim Gillespie
Anth Pearson
Jamie Wilson
Simon Mulvaney
Dave Graham
Michael Pearson

So, basically everyone! I roped in Gav Kershaw and had Simma outfield. Mickey Pearson cried off around an hour before kick off and that was exceptionally frustrating. When I ask someone to play football, I really expect them there and other reasons should not be coming into it. Considering we had only eleven made it even more bad for the team.

However, he did give Ed Morrison a lift there and was there for the opening half to give some moral support (and to watch an expected hammering). It was only Dave Gourlay's resourcefulness which led to Sassco getting a player who'd just been sleeping in a skip. Cold water splashed in the face did the trick. Muers, also originally a missing player, turned up before kick off as we had twelve players including me. Dave Graham and Mickey Walker along with Bri Marley and Jon Wardle were all unavailable.

I know we had problems, but so did the draw specialists, Hylton CW. It was ringers galore as both teams were struggling in the last day. The heat was quite intense, but ironically we seemed to cope amazingly well. We were spraying the ball about well and definitely played the better football throughout the game. We had the majority of chances in the first half and saw two of them from Swinhoe go amiss. Near the end of the half, Dave Gourlay broke free inside the box and curled a superb shot to make it 1-0. It was tad bit disputed, because most saw that the ball went out of play, but our linesman didn't give it because he wasn't 100%. Hylton CW weren't too pleased about it, but then again, I did give the okay for their superstars to be on the field of play, so stop whinging.

We really dominated in the opening half which made it more the frustrating when we we conceded one early in the second. It was poor marking which irritated me as the referee failed to give offside. I've told the team to constantly remain goalside. It was getting worse when we went 2-1 down with a superb looping shot which went over Gav Kershaw.

We came back from this and weathered a brief bit of pressure. Swinhoe also shaved the post in one of our many attacks.

Changes had to be made. I took our Hendonite off, pushed Macca into the middle with Gourlay and put the Piltdown Man on the right. Instantly we scored to make it 2-2. A superb strike from Cresswell. Swinhoe should have made it 3-2 with around four minutes remaining, but lack of composure saw him allow the goalkeeper to smother it.

A disorganised end to the season, but surprisingly some excellent football on show despite the hastily put together side. Season's ended, but we will be having a busy programme of friendlies lined up. I'm one for Summer Football and will be taking advantage of the excellent weather.

For some weird reason, they voted Macca as their Man-of-the-match. Baffles me how. He could barely pass from A to B let alone C. He told me that they were saying, "He's torturing us," when I pointed out that it was actually our lot who were saying that about him.

Billy Hard Sports Complex
League Division 1
Hylton CW 2
Sassco.co.uk 2 Dave Gourlay, Mark Cresswell
Sassco.co.uk: Gavin Kershaw, Dave Simpson, Chris Dixon, Mark Muers, Ed Morrison, Davinder Sangha, Dave Gourlay, Mark McDermont*, Mark Cresswell, Andy Swinhoe.

Mountain Daisy 4 Sassco.co.uk 0.
Errors at the back and lack of composure up front.

Pearson to Emu
Anth Pearson makes simple pass inside to Dunston.

Emu to Pearson
Who, being a nonce, decides to pass it back, instead of getting it forward.

Pearson sold short
The pass being crap and too short, is intercepted by the Mountain Daisy player.

Emu arsehole. Pearson in tears.
Who races on towards goal, reducing Pearson to tears and making Dunston look like a nob-head.

A tumultuous week for me in terms of football. My head's been up my own backside for most of it. Firstly, due to contractual reasons, I was forced to call on Emu for the 6-a-side, which meant we suffered a defeat. I sent a hundred and one texts out to confirm the midweek game away to Hylton CW, which although was cancelled early, meant another hundred and one texts. I forgot to text Dave Gourlay which meant he was stuck at Billy Hardy slagging me off. Then it was Thursday football, another defeat, despite Emu somehow bagging two goals and, at the end of it, too much football.

This meant my plans for Saturday were a bit late. We're seeing the season out so I'm not as frantic as I usually am. I knew we were missing a few. Tim, Marky and Mickey Pearson all cried off. Tim's excuse is that he's getting married. You're wasting your time as it'll all end in tears mate. So with Tiger Tim missing, I kept with 4-4-2 as Macca still clearly can't fill his boots.

Football injury to testicles.

We were at Quarry View against Mountain Daisy. It's the first time I've been there and it seems to be an outstanding venue. But, in the searing heat, we dropped a good few clangers with about a minute on the clock. It was in the Sub League Cup and I'd given up on it when we were walloped by Rubiheat. True, I started it by saying we had a good chance. It took a Dave Graham wonder goal to break down the schizophrenic Park View (who seem to beat everyone apart from us) and then I just wanted to humiliate Mickey Donkin (again) in our 5-0 bludgeoning of them. Mountain Daisy were a different proposition. I won't describe the opener, but will let the photos at the top do the talking. It safe to say that Emu is rapidly becoming the donut / village idiot of the team. I would have ditched him years ago, but he's on one of them long contracts I drew up without reading the small print.

Then, Macca being a spacca, gave away a corner when he had loads of time. After the second attempt (the first corner being headed away), they were 2-0 up. Macca implored me to slag someone else off at the end of the game, but being docile that he is, I only remember his clangers and would have forgot had he not reminded me at the end of the game.

A true disaster, but then the team drove on. We actually performed really well but missed around four or five gilt edged chances in the opening half. Dixon, up front, skied one. Gourlay, after getting the ball caught under his feet, recovered but then ballooned it. Cressy missed some good ones by firing wide, and our Man-of-the-match, Dave Graham came close with some long distance drives. I was preparing to give a good talk at half time dwelling on the positives, but it was then when the normally impeccable Jamie Wilson got caught in possession and we were 3-0 down. I did warn him minutes before, saying they were "on to him," as he was caught out.

Half time came and went. No major changes, but not many chances in the second half. Both centre halves dropped a clanger when they weren't goalside of a solitary striker and saw the ball loop over Simma's head. Poor show all around. Finishing was diabolical and defence was laughable.

Dave Gourlay's not happy. Macca's shite.

Anth P signalled me to come on and when this happens it usually ends in tears. But, I gave Emu a rollicking, pushed Jamie up front and Dixon back and we didn't concede any more goals. frustration crept in to the game. Si got in on the act and started to lash out later on in the game. I think his opponent was slagging off his bright orange Nike clogs. He got a caution for his worries. Dave Graham also had plenty to say to the referee, Steve Watson, and got himself booked as well. It was harsh as he was apparently fouled before they scored their fourth goal. Jamie also threatened to descend into tourettes again.

Being honest, my pre-match team talk wasn't too inspiring. I was just happy to get there with 11 or 12 players. Swinhoe cried off with Man Flu beforehand, but the lack of team talk didn't tell Emu or Jamie to drop a bollock when in defence. It proves my theory that we're lacking in bite against the stronger team as we always seem to be doing. Not many positives at all. Ed had a good game. Dave Graham was easily our best player, while Cressy did his part.

Quarry View
Subsidiary League
Mountain Daisy 4
Sassco.co.uk 0
Sassco.co.uk: Dave Simpson, Anthony Pearson (Davinder Sangha), Marc McDermont, Mark Muers, Dave Graham*, Ed Morrison, Chris Dixon, Dave Gourlay, Simon Mulvaney, Mark Cresswell, Jamie Wilson.

Sassco.co.uk 5 Mickey Donkin 0.
Sangha at left back, Gourlay, Tim, Cressy and Macca score, Donkin destroyed.

Dave Gourlay celebrates his free-kick. Jamie Wilson's in the background.

I've got to say that during my management career since 2002, I've dropped many a bollock (Emu in goal for a while, asking Ed Cook to do a warm up, convincing Stubba he's a good centre half and pairing Cola Boy with the Tash - which is like asking Pete Doherty and Victor Meldrew to control the midfield). Today I fully admitted that this could have been another one of those. We went to 4-4-2 and partnering Swinhoe up front was...Muers. Jaws dropped in the changing room and I'm sure Swinhoe was tempted to walk out. Nevertheless, it was point proven, as when Muers went up front he was, and generally proved, how shite he was up there for ninety minutes. "It's the first and last time," I told him when he ballooned a perfect chance near the end of the game. The other reason why everyone was on alert was that I was there as left back. This meant Jamie and Pearson were busy arguing over who was going to be the left central defender - apparently to carry me all game.

But, as I've done before (especially on the Tuesday's) I've proved my critics (all ten players for Sassco today) wrong and was Giacinto Facchetti (look it up) like in my performance today. I spent all game isolated because Cressy didn't have a clue which is left or right. It was classed as "Donkin Day" again and poor Mickey has lost three out of three this season against us. Baffles me how he gets ninety minutes each time we play them. I've seen more potent piss stains than him.

A dream team on show, Mickey Pearson, Andy Swinhoe, Davinder Sangha and Dave Simpson.

The game itself saw Sassco, with Cresswell on the left and Macca on the right, make many forays into the Cauld Lad half, but they decided to stay there. The pressure on the full backs and defence was quite a bit, but we all coped. A perfect free kick from Dave Gourlay put us 1-0 ahead and then Cressy fired one shot stopped by Joe Walters in goal, only to see Tiger Tim Gillespie, who spent Wednesday circling Sunderland so he didn't have to play Rubiheat, ram home the rebound. We then had countless chances and most fell down due to poor passing in the box, when I was screaming for people to shoot.

Second half saw Cauld Lad up their attacking a little bit. But once we weathered around fifteen minutes of pressure, Mickey Pearson picked out a pin point pass to Macca on the right hand side and he wandered into the box to fire a goal in at a tight angle. No one cheered so we thought it went wide, as they usually do. It was lucky he scored because I had a paragraph or two ready to slag him off today. He injured himself early on (by keeping hold of the ball too long) and was a bit of a limping (or is that limp wrist) passenger in the first. Also, everyone was screaming at me to do something when he was down and injured, to which I correctly replied, "Do I look like a fucking physio." Our medical man is Chris Dixon, but he's always ill or injured. After this, Cresswell scored two goals. The first he fired at the keeper and then slotted in his rebound and finally he managed to take a shot without hitting the goalkeeper to make it 5-0.

Overall, against any stronger team, we'd have been walloped. Both wingers did nothing to come back when they lost the ball. Muers was crap in attack. It was like watching a baldy Bond villain wallowing about in attack with a touch like a baby elephant. He's simply out of date as an attacker

Highlight of the game was Ed Morrison at right back who gained our Man-of-the-match award - truly outstanding, patient and very calm.

Downhill Complex
Subsidiary League
Sassco.co.uk 5 Dave Gourlay, Mark McDermont, Tim Gillespie, Mark Cresswell (2)
Mickey Donkin 0
Sassco.co.uk: Dave Simpson, Davinder Sangha, Marc McDermont, Mark Muers, Mickey Pearson, Ed Morrison*, Andy Swinhoe, Dave Gourlay, Tim Gillespie, Mark Cresswell, Jamie Wilson.

Rubiheat 5 Sassco.co.uk 1.
Simma outfield, Si up front = chaotic game.

Wednesday games are always a bit of a bummer. The last one we had was, I think, back in the 2005 Season. It's especially bad considering that half of our squad usually needs a passport to get into Sunderland. Dave Graham, Mark Middlemiss to name a few. Dixon, Jamie and Tim were unable to make it to this one, mainly down to work. Dave Gourlay and Cresswell had a pressing twenty minutes of football to take care off in a 5-a-side League (I wouldn't get out of bed for anything less than twenty-seven minutes), so I to call on reinforcements. To be honest, had it been an important game and if we were gunning for the top positions in the League, I would have demanded everyone be there (unless working). We do have our last League game away To Hylton CW, next Wednesday and I will be demanding a full side. But in this case, out of the hat popped Gavin Kershaw, who keeps complaining that I've never played him against any minging teams. That meant Simma was outfield. Pearson and Emu were centre half, but with no Tim, I gave Si the mouthwatering option of in front of the defence or on the left wing. He chose the defence, but his original position was up front where I eventually put him when we switched to 4-4-2. For the last two games, 4-5-1 simply hasn't seemed to be working. Let's not forget that our powerhouse performances this season have all come from 4-5-1, but it's definitely lost it's way. Once we went 1-0 in the Sub League Cup against the vastly superior Rubiheat, I changed it back to 4-4-2 with Si Mulvaney up front. However, thinking about it, I just think it's missed chances against the teams at our level and a failure to track back in our defeats against the strongest.

The opening goal was really poor. Pearson apparently shouted for the ball, but Simma steamed in and headed it clear to their player instead. Mickey Pearson takes up the story, "I openly admit the first goal was a mix up between me and Simma, which shouldn't have happened. But there was no need for him to come across my path to head the ball when I had a free header." To be honest I think the whole back line was quite shaken at this time as I saw them shite themselves when they heard Gav K shouting "Keepers!" at the top of his voice. Normally it's pleasantly quiet back there.

Ironically, I had to leave before the half ended. I could have waited until half time, but I deliberately left Emu with the task of making any changes, which became easier for him when Tim, travelling from God knows where, was going to be way too late. We had no subs, but I still asked everyone to make sure they bombarded Emu with requests and demands that they play in certain positions. Mickey Pearson told me that him and Dave Graham did most of the half time talking, which means that Emu's management skills, just like his captaincy is rancid and putrid. Second half saw Sassco making no impact at all (that's what I heard). Emu blamed most of the team when he dropped the kit off after the game and Mickey Pearson did the same. Si, up front was ineffective, while Swinhoe, despite reducing the arrears with a much needed goal (we were 2-0 down at the time), struggled. Most criticism was levelled at Ed, who failed to track back, leaving poor Simma under immense pressure. The only ones who seemed to come out with any praise were Gav Kershaw and also Dave Graham. Pearson also hobbled off late in the game and everyone else seemed to be on their last legs.

Pearson continues with his assessment, "Basically we sat too deep at the back for most of the game. Their second goal proved this. For most of the entire game we didn't track runners, which is normally a problem. We allowed their centre midfielders and number 12 (a striker who dropped off) far too much space. Gav Kershaw actually made a few good saves and couldn't really do anything about the goals." Emu was also lavishing praise on Gav as well by saying he was calling for the ball, coming for it at the right time and easily gathering in any loose corners. Not surprising with Emu at the heart of your defence. But we're really only saying all this about Gav Kershaw because we'd be desperate for him to turn up again for another good kicking in the near future.

Forgot to mention that Marky Mark made a return. He spent the majority of the pre-match dropping hints about the fact that he won the National Army Cup Final down Aldershot. During the game, he was heard mumbling, "I'm too good for this shite. I really should be the Captain as well." amongst other ludicrous claims.

So, Simon up front, Simma as right back. A bit chaotic, but as the team's going nowhere, it's a good time to experiment. The strike force hasn't been firing on all cylinders recently, so there is a strong rumour going around that Emu might be playing centre forward in the much anticipated "Donkin Day" this Saturday.

Final word has to be the amount of texts from all the players (even the normally silent Swinhoe) and anonymous threatening phone calls I got after the game saying I'd be "seen to" if I ever put Emu in charge again. I even had one text from Phil McNerney calling me a "prick" and he hasn't played since 2004. However, I think he just sent it anyway and it had nothing to do with the game.

Stannington Grove
Subsidiary League
Rubiheat 5
Sassco.co.uk 1 Andy Swinhoe
Sassco.co.uk: Gavin Kershaw, Dave Simpson, Simon Mulvaney, Marc McDermont, Mark Muers, Anthony Pearson, Mickey Pearson, Ed Morrison, Andy Swinhoe, Mark Middlemiss, Dave Graham*.

Cambridge FC 4 Sassco.co.uk 2.
Game of two halves with the second dominated by "tourettes syndrome".

The North East Aircraft Museum had some sort of event on so we had to pass through a military check point. The lad asked if I was going to the show, but I said football instead where he kept a tighter than usual grip on his plastic gun and gave me that incredulous look that he assumed that Asians Don't Play Football. I got through without looking too shifty and was glad he didn't find that semtex I'd nestled into the boot next to the spare air freshner and water bottles. All the players arrived in dribs and drabs. Cressy showed up in his cobbled together car and was immediately dropped from the side as he didn't bring his subs or his fine which he's owed me for quite a while. I suggested to him not to bother with the kit and get himself a pint from the Three Horse Shoes. Lucky for us, his "pimp" Macca, turned up with £20 which he owed him. This was quickly swiped by our Tax Collector, Emu, who took the subs and also the £8 he owed out of it. I had to give Digga the bad news that he was benched as I told him beforehand that he's starting "unless Cressy miraculously brings his subs and his £8."

The squad was full. Mickey Pearson made a late night u-turn as he originally retired again. Dave Gourlay also made a show considering he was sniffing about with illness from our waste of time 6-a-side in the pouring and freezing rain on Thursday. Only Dave Graham and Mark Middlemiss were missing, but we dropped a bit of a bollock against the Cambridge. They've never defeated us in three seasons until now and it was a game where we did have the odd few chance to get back into it. Mickey Pearson, who scrambled in the opening goal in the first minute, said that "it was a game of two halves." Probably true, but it's more about Sassco simply not finishing their chances when they have them. I counted three major strikes on goal in the second half, when we'd suffered a 2-1 set back. Cressy had one, Swinhoe had one and so did Gourlay. All were wide, albeit agonizingly. The first half we seemed to be in reasonable control. The opening goal made us more comfortable, but as the game neared the end of the first, we didn't really take advantage of what dominance we had.

Second half saw the Traitor come on for them as he tends to just turn up and get a game at the expense of everyone else. But he changed it in a few chaotic minutes for us. A poor corner wasn't dealt with and that bloke from Dad's Army nodded it in with no pressure on him. Moments later, a long throw in caused panic and Simpson managed to claw the ball into his arms - but the referee, in his infinite wisdom, declared the goal was good. I think some of their lads at the end said it wasn't over the line and Macca, who spent most of the game wallowing in the mud and making a fool of himself, said the same. 2-1 and we were up against it. They were now controlling it, but Cressy broke clear on the left hand side, just as I was contemplating switching to 4-4-2, and got tackled late. Penalty! And there was me, cursing our luck saying we'd miss it before we took it. Cressy didn't let the team down and he had the balls to take it. 2-2. It was then that we lost the game. The opponents were given too much time on the ball and Tyson struck a curling shot way beyond Simma to make it 3-2. They scored from a very quick free-kick not too long after, when all our muppets were switched off and arguing with the referee.

The game then seemed to open up quite a bit and we gained the three major chances as mentioned earlier. Jamie and Mickey P also came close, but that's why we lose games. We don't take our chances and despite playing good football and coping with most teams, we won't win if we don't score. I had to switch things around a bit. Dixon came on for Ed Morrison and ended up in centre half position as Emu literally bust his gut. Pearson was decent in the centre midfield role until a minute into the game after he scored. He then spent the rest of it watching the helicopters in the NEAM Event. Jamie showed some quite deft touches as he left the Cambridge players on their backsides a good few times. It was balanced out though, because Macca spent most of his time on his arse as well.

Just going off on a tangent here, but we've just about arranged two away games in the Summer against Northern League Shildon AFC and West Auckland FC (both probably mid July). Should be fun.

Our next event is this Wednesday at 6pm at Hill View. Definitely struggling for a side for Wednesday but hopefully we can muster around eleven players together. Will let everyone know as soon as possible. Essentially, everyone will have to travel to the game from work to be there for a 6:00pm (or thereabouts) kick off.

That's it then. We won't really have any chance of a top four finish now in my opinion, but we don't really deserve it. Not much else to say really about today apart from the number of helicopters flying overhead. I though we were in the middle of "Apocalypse Now" on occasions. But I did notice that most of the players on our side seemed to burst into simultaneous tourettes syndrome near the end of the second half. The words, "f**k off", "c**t" and "f**k off you wanker" being the most popular ones.

Plessey's
League Division 1
Cambridge FC 4
Sassco.co.uk 2 Mickey Pearson, Mark Cresswell (pen)
Sassco.co.uk: Dave Simpson, Simon Mulvaney, Jamie Wilson, Marc McDermont, Tim Gillespie, Mark Muers (Anthony Pearson), Mickey Pearson, Dave Gourlay*, Mark Cresswell, Ed Morrison (Chris Dixon), Andy Swinhoe.

Cambridge v Sassco.co.uk.
Waterlogged pitch - game cancelled.

Pitch was a tad bit waterlogged. Colin Holmes, Secretary of the Cambridge was aware of this last night, but none of us could get in touch with the referee. An inspection before the game announced the obvious. We had a little kick around on the pitch itself, but as you can see in the picture, we haven't really done the grass any favours for Cambridge's next game.

We play in the Subsidiary League away to Mountain Daisy next week. I daresay that the cancelled game will be added to either the 3rd or the 10th May as both teams don't have any games on that day

Sassco.co.uk 2 Park View 1.
Mickey Pearson, Ed Morrison and Bri Marley all return to a depleted squad.

Michael Pearson returned an emphatic, "No! Fuck off, I'm busy." when I crawlingly texted to see if he'd be available for our rapidly depleting squad. This was on Friday and slowly but surely the seed of Sassco spread like a virus through his veins and eventually he relented with a reluctant confirmation late on Friday and early on Saturday that he'd definitely be there. Due to his high wages, he was sponsored by Happy Shopper for this game.

The SMS system was going through a wobbler considering the amount of requests made. We were hampered by the fact that no more players are allowed to be signed on, but I haven't got a problem with that as I'd prefer to get some non-regulars back into action. We were missing a good few. Dixon was "away" somewhere. Tim was working. Jamie is currently fighting with his physio to avoid crutches. Macca was also working as well but said he might be available for the second half. In addition to Mickey Pearson, in came Ed Morrison after I pestered him with giving me a "yes" or a "no". Bri Marley also said he'd be available after work - but I didn't expect him to turn up. I also demanded an early appearance from everyone with one of my threatening texts. Everyone bar two (with excuses) turned up on time.

We kicked off with a full twelve with Pearson slotting in at centre half, Ed at right wing. Marky Mark was also making his first show since the away defeat to Seaham The George. He had a very good game as public transport seems to be doing the world of good for him. Pearson was in for a difficult task as he hadn't played for four weeks and also that he'd be getting Emu out of the shit during the game (like Jamie has been doing in the last few weeks). Emu had decided to talk to me again after I ditched the poor sap midweek in order to win the Cup on the 6-a-side (yes another plug for me).

The weather wasn't as bad as everyone expected as we had bits of a blizzard interspaced with sunshine. Wasn't too bright on the pitch. We looked out of sorts. We really didn't do much with the ball and seemed to either dwell on it too much or waste a quick pass. I was screaming at the back line to launch it clear while players on the pitch wanted it played short. I've really got to stop swearing. I made a pledge early season that I was going to stop, but when you have Emu and Cressy on the pitch, it's shittingly difficult. One incident had be frothing at the mouth. It led to a speculative shot which looped over Simma to give Park View a 1-0 lead. We didn't respond quick enough. Park View then hit the post and saw the ball come out between a mass of their players and just as a second goal seemed likely, it was somehow cleared. I's say that was our bad point in the game. We did manage to start penetrating a bit more. After a good few saves by their 'keeper, along with a glorious chance which flew over the bar from Cressy, as well as one tipped over from Ed's chances. The aforementioned, Ed Morrison, stole in behind and after chipping the ball high over the 'keeper, rammed it into the back of the empty net. Ironically, he did his calf in and had to come off. Coincidentally, Bri Bob Marley (nicknamed because he looks like him) had turned up, pumped full of himself and came on in the second when I changed it from 4-5-1 to 4-4-2.

Second half we dominated. Bri Marley got himself a yellow card after the referee said he didn't like the look in his eye. We were getting frustrated at this point, but lucky for us, a few strange errors from Simma were the only chances that Park View gained. We were eventually liberated by a stunning top corner drive from Dave Graham midway in the second. After this we had more chances with a good few goalmouth scrambles. Park View's 'keeper was excellent. He saved an almost certain goal from Dave Graham before the goal came. Cressy also missed an open goal when set up by Swinhoe.

At the other end, hero of the hour was Spice Boy Mickey Pearson. A long ball over the top saw the defence caught cold. Their man was one on one with Simma, when in came Mickey Pearson (also known as Super Pea now to Emu) to tackle the player. The score was kept at 2-1 and we gained an important win.

Cressy, always one to complain when I slag him off, has some more ammunition now because he didn't pay me his £8 fine and also buggered off without taking the nets down or putting them up. He'll be doing two out of the three next week. Disciplining him's getting to be a pain in the backside and the feelers are out for a more compliant replacement.

Downhill Complex
Subsidiary League Competition
Sassco.co.uk 2 Ed Morrison, Dave Graham
Park View 1
Sassco.co.uk: Dave Simpson, Simon Mulvaney, Mark Muers, Mickey Pearson, Dave Gourlay, Dave Graham*, Anthony Pearson, Mark Cresswell, Ed Morrison (Brian Marley), Andy Swinhoe, Mark Middlemiss.

Blue House 5 Sassco.co.uk 1.
Shocking set-piece defending and poor finishing.

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Any thoughts of a late surge were firmly put back in their place as the team suffered a hangover and a 5-1 defeat.

Struggled to get there as well today. Poxy Garmin SatNav isn't a patch on TomTom and sent me on a wild goose chase. Worse was for Simma as he had a picturesque journey through Herrington with Bri Watson and Swinhoe. Biggest problem was actually getting Cressy to put white shorts on instead of the minging off white efforts he's always clamming to get on. Another problem was that he kept on pestering Jamie as he's try to get away with one of Jamie's good looking mates. No, not Mickey Walker, but someone called Laura Coburn (I think). He's also refusing to give out her MSN address to Macca who was sniffing around - so, Laura Bird, if you're reading this, Macca's MSN is macnista@hotmail.com and, if you are as good looking as he claims you are, mine is davinder__sangha@hotmail.com. We're both better than Cressy will ever be. Although today, Macca could barely kick shit off a step (to quote the legendary Tash) and Cressy did get his goal and his usual picture in the paper.

First half was quite below average. We conceded almost immediately, when Pearson, in as left half (as I always save him to play against the decent teams) committed a nonchalant foul. Defensively, we seemed impotent as the ball was fired in and we were a goal down. We started a good fight back and did have quite a few chances. Disappointingly, we didn't take advantage of anything. Cressy failed to put pressure on their right back and he had enough space and time to pick out one of their players. The resulting melee led to another goal. Even with this setback, we created chances. Emu came very close as his lay off from a corner squirmed agonizingly wide. Swinhoe's standing bicycle kick saw the keeper stretch to tip it over. Dave Graham, with a clear shot at goal launched it high.

So many chances and at half time, with the wind against us, we had it all to do. Cressy was switched to attack in the second and secured an excellent goal. His all round play in the second was very good, but we simply couldn't take any more chances. From one of our corner kicks, they sent the ball long and Macca, who had a crap game, was outpaced by their centre forward. Poor Macca now realises that there's no way that he'll ever be able to fill Tiger Tim's boots.

At 3-1 it was well and truly over. John Cairns had time and space in the box to make it 4-1 and late on, Pea, comfortably taking the ball out of the box after we'd won it, lost it to their player who went on to score. I was on at this late stage. I came on for an injured Dave Graham, who, if going by his shooting, won't have many kills and Iraq and Afghanistan neither.

A poor show all around. We really have to look at it and say we were let down by defence and attack. The amount of good chances we had weren't put away and every dead ball at the back looked as if Blue House were going to score. Once again, we gave away goals and found it too difficult to get back into it.

Also, at the end, some players were imploring the referee to blow the whistle due to the bad conditions. This is a very bad and, dare I say, shitty attitude. Come rain, sun, sleet or fucking nuclear holocaust, I expect all the be there and fight for the 90 minutes. This game could have been easily lost 3-1 or 2-1 rather than a 5-1 walloping. At the end of the season, everyone will see this for what it is - a kicking. Need to have a 90 minute attitude. Remember, it really doesn't take a lot to score a goal sometimes.

Good bunch of lads as well are Blue House. A good, hard and fair game with both teams doing their bit. Good referee as well.

Hill View
League Division 1
Blue House 5
Sassco.co.uk 1 Mark Cresswell
Sassco.co.uk: Dave Simpson, Simon Mulvaney, Mark Muers, Jamie Wilson, Dave Gourlay, Dave Graham (Davinder Sangha), Anthony Pearson, Mark Cresswell, Chris Dixon*, Andy Swinhoe, Marc McDermont.

Sassco.co.uk 2 Seaham The George 0.
Reasonably comprehensive win over our closest challengers.

Some charver had taken away and probably cooked the dead fox we found last week, so no half time munchies for the boys. Also, no water neither. I did explain that I couldn't fit anything else into the car and we definitely need a water carrier. This left most quite parched (including me).

I approached this game against Seaham with some trepidation. We'd been soundly overwhelmed in the first half of our away game against them, but made a comeback in the second before cruelly conceding a third late on. This time I explained to the team that there were no real excuses. We were reasonably full-strength with me and Pearson missing out (Pea was at the SAFC game), but in coming Dave Graham and Chris Dixon.

It started a little bit late. But once we did kick off, Seaham were constantly bickering at the referee. It didn't help them much when we opened the scoring. Cresswell, supposedly on the left hand side, cut inside the box on the right and maneuvered himself to take a perfect left foot strike. We were surprisingly comfortable for the majority of the half. Simma didn't really make any major saves and the only scary moment was a Muers Moment, when he megged himself to allow their player to strike the ball with some venom. It crashed out off the inside of the bar and it was quite obvious that the luck was with us for a change. One of the Seaham lads was constantly on at our sidelines, challenging Nellie and co. to a fight every other minute. Best one was when he taunted big Cressy, saying what's he doing on the sidelines. Quite obvious really - he plays for another team.

Second half saw the game open up quite a bit. By now, Seaham had gained two cautions for incessant complaints, swearwords, etc. It took them off their game. Some, including Tony Burnhope, tried to calm them down, but all in vain. Seaham were simply playing into Sassco's hands and failed to muster any decent chances in the second half. Both Muers and Jamie were truly rock solid at the back and snuffed out any threats. We awarded Jamie Man of the Match, down to his excellent play which was calm and assured. Macca and Si Mulvaney at either side got into the action, with Macca making a 60 yard run before ballooning it as we'd expect. It was during the second when were really had some good chances. Some of them were cut out by last minute tackles, but on one stage, Cressy broke clear and rammed it home from a tight angle. This means that Macca has to clean Cressy's boots for tomorrow as they both had a pre-match bet. Cressy took his goals very well and looked a real threat all game. He did spend quite a bit of it winding their biggest player up which is typical Cressy. For once I'll be positive about his performance and won't mention the one clanger he skied in the first half and the fact that he's got a gambling problem.

With around ten or fifteen minutes left, there was no way back for Seaham. All our players did themselves proud. Tim, in particular was quite busy in front of the defence and both DG's in the centre are quite unstoppable sometimes. Swinhoe had a half decent game as the lone striker a brought a lot of players into the game. However this was at a cost to his own as he scuffed some good chances, otherwise he'd be on the score sheet. We played out the rest of the game and grabbed three impressive points in one of the most comprehensive wins we've had for quite a while. And this is more the better considering we've lost quite a few regular players over the last few weeks, but the form has improved.

The only worrying moment at the end was some more suspected dog shit on Dixon's shoe. We remember that he struggled to regain form for a good few years as it affected him and the team quite a bit.

Downhill Complex
League Division 1
Sassco.co.uk 2 Mark Cresswell 2
Seaham The George 0
Sassco.co.uk: Dave Simpson, Simon Mulvaney, Mark Muers, Jamie Wilson*, Dave Gourlay, Dave Graham, Tim Gillespie, Mark Cresswell, Chris Dixon, Andy Swinhoe, Marc McDermont.

Sassco.co.uk 3 The Cauld Lad 1.
"Donkin Day" ends in Mickey Donkin taking our boots away to clean.

A very problematic week. Andy Farrer announced that he'd be a non-regular from now on. Dixon, Marky and Dave Graham were all unavailable. We were due to get Steve Farquhar in after Nigel Kirkham announced he was also unavailable. I then found out that Farquhar had signed on for the Cauld Lad but hadn't played a game. Therefore, we only had 11 and that included me. The look on the players faces as they stepped in the changing rooms and saw me in full kit didn't bode well. Dave Gourlay didn't even look me in the eye.

The other issue was that we were facing Cauld Lad. Now, we walloped them last time, but since then, we've had a dip in form and they were coming back off an amazing 2-1 win over Fulwell Blue Bell. Not good. Also, Mickey Donkin was playing for them and it was a question of; was it "Donkin Day" or would Mickey resort to his age old role of being Emu's bitch.

Then another bad sign. We also discovered a dead fox next to our sitting area. Normally the pong tends to come off Emu, but this one looked a bit festered, despite still having some meaty bits in case Swinhoe got a bit peckish.

The line up then. Back four I placed myself as left back and shuffled Pea to right wing instead of moving Si up there. Up front, Cressy remained there after his heroics last week and Swinhoe was left wing. Macca and Gourlay were in centre mid in contrast to the missing Dave Graham and Mark Middlemiss who were there last week. Emu and Jamie were both centre half while the ever dependable Simma was in goal. The wind was playing up quite heavily and I really feared the conditions because we struggled badly in the last game for one half. For this one, we had an unusual half. The back four were rarely troubled apart from a Paul McClusky free-kick and also a stunning save by Simma from the older Cresswell. By this time, we were 1-0 up. A punt from Emu, which he claimed was a pass (yeah right...), was latched on to by Pearson who crossed in for Mark Cresswell. A great start, but Cressy had a very strange day. He had countless chances and wasted most of them by either:

scuffing them.
skying them.
trying to walk them in.
blaming the bobble on the pitch.
blaming the ball.
blaming the time of month.
blaming me.
blaming his boy.

1-0 at half time with the wind against us in the second half. Not good.

By this time, I was in full pessimist mode, lamenting to Jamie that it's going to be 1-1, that taxes are going to go up and so on. I'd pushed Cressy to the left at half time and Swinhoe up front. We seemed to be getting caught offside by an over-zealous (but decent) referee. He sent one of the Cauld Lad players off for swearing at him and had cautioned both Cresswell and McDermont. Eventually, Gourlay (I think) pulling out wide, centred for Cresswell who finally got a second. So, not bad as it was around 2 chances out of 10 - what a ratio. Moments later, Swinhoe put one away which was 1 chance out of 1. We dominated, but then momentarily switched off. Chances came and went - Gourlay saw his shot saved by Kev Mc, and then they scored from a diving header. The game ended not too long after and the only downside is a possible fracture or break in Jamie's arm. We'll find out soon and hope it's only bruising.

A good win and a very above average performance which was only hampered by the amount of chances we (I mean Cressy) missed. At the back, Jamie and Emu were 100% commanding, which was obvious considering that I was barking at them all game. Pea was moved back in the defence, switching with Si, just before the half. Reasoning was that we needed possession in the second half based on the wind, and that Si was more comfortable at this than Pea. But as said, it was all good. Also, the fact that I was on for ninety minutes for the first time since our friendly against Whitley Bay back in the heat of Summer, and that we also won at the same time means that I may well keep my place in the side.

At the end of the game, Mickey Donkin and Paul McClusky agreed to take Muers' and my own boots back home to clean. Gentle scrubbing motion and no detergent please lads.

Downhill Complex
League Division 1
Sassco.co.uk 3 Mark Cresswell 2, Andy Swinhoe
The Cauld Lad 1
Sassco.co.uk: Dave Simpson, Simon Mulvaney, Mark Muers, Jamie Wilson, Dave Gourlay, Anthony Pearson, Tim Gillespie, Mark Cresswell, Davinder Sangha, Andy Swinhoe, Marc McDermont.

Seaham The George 3 Sassco.co.uk 2.
Everyone's gutted.

Anyone who knows me understands me to be a pessimist at heart. I'm the one who expects half the team to turn up, the kit to go pink in the wash and also my car not to start after a game. Playing Seaham was one of those days. They are our near rivals. Cameron had invested heavily in his team, but then got shunted upstairs as the role of Technical Director due to an internal power struggle. You can see him during games wandering around, Bill Shankly style, waiting to take the reigns again. This actually nearly happened to me, but then I told everyone that Emu would then be next in line, which quickly quelled any dissent.

We were suffering player shortages. Dixon peaked with his two goals last week and quickly announced that he's never going to play for Sassco again. He said he will be taking early retirement (that is - until his return next week). Gourlay was out on the lash in some foreign climes (Edinburgh I think). Josh has now become a non-regular due to work and Andy Farrer is still injured. Cresswell was the same, but luckily decided to get himself on in the second half. So, prior to all this, with all the shortages, In came Nigel Kirkham, who initially was due to play back in the Summer. Ideally, I was going to add him to the line up with about fifteen or twenty minutes to go as he would be listening to my words of wisdom on our rapidly deteriorating bench while sipping tea. But Gav Brown did a dirty drop out on the day and he was hastily drafted in to start. We also had Dave Graham and Mark Middlemiss travelling up from a morning 11-a-side. On top of that, the wind was blowing heavily, so it wasn't really the best of preparations.

We suffered badly in the opening half. A lost ball down their left hand side saw Tony Burnhope (once heavily touted to join Sassco) nod in the opener, while Pea and Muers were standing left and right of him. None of them actually stood in front of him goalside where he'd have more of a struggle if they were. Not long after this, a corner kick saw one of their lads completely free and unmarked to head it in to make it 2-0. A poor start. Worryingly, this was early on and we looked disjointed. They had further chances including one saved by Simma, but by then, we'd found our feet. Right at the death of the half, Swinhoe latched on to a lost ball and fired in, only to see a deflection off their player, take all the power out.

The second then. During the first, Cressy announced he wanted to get on. I assumed he was still heavily injured, but he wanted on. That combined with the wind in our favour turned the game. I'm never one to blame the conditions, but you could see the change in the second as Seaham really struggled with the conditions, just like we did in the first. Cressy, playing up front, managed to evade some scything tackles and fired in a goal at a tight angle from the right hand side. We pressured for most of the half, but slowly we were running out of steam. Both Dave Graham and Mark Middlemiss were now slowing down. Marky had a glazed look in his eyes for the last twenty. However, good work from Dave Graham led to the second goal. Again, it was the right hand side where Davey evaded one tackle only to be put out of stride by another. He kept going, but the referee belatedly blew the whistle for the earlier challenge and Cressy dispatched the equaliser from the spot. By now, Cressy was causing no ends of problems for Seaham, but unfortunately, everyone else's energy seemed to ebb away.

After all the hard work, we gave it away. Their number 4 evaded a few challenges before putting a wicked ball across the face of goal. Somehow, Muers ping ponged the ball off one of their players and it was 3-2. This was with around three minutes remaining. We really didn't have the strength to fight back for it now. Sassco did what I asked, they won the second half, but the killer touch and lack of fitness cost us. Also, missing Dixon, Gourlay and Cressy (for the first half) from last weeks game meant it was a tall order against a strong team. Bitterly disappointed with Gav Brown dropping out on the day, thus changing the look of the team. Nigel Kirkham seemed to get into the swing of things late in the first, but it wasn't the ideal game to come in to.

Some weird and wonderful results today. Park View hammered Blue House 4-2 away and our next opponents, Cauld Lad, defeated Fulwell Blue Bell 2-1 away. It's going to be a difficult game next week against Cauld Lad.

Ryhope Rec.
League Division 1
Seaham The George 3
Sassco.co.uk 2 Mark Cresswell 2 (1 pen)
Sassco.co.uk: Dave Simpson, Simon Mulvaney, Mark Muers, Jamie Wilson, Dave Graham, Anthony Pearson, Tim Gillespie, Nigel Kirkham (Mark Cresswell), Mark Middlemiss, Andy Swinhoe, Marc McDermont.

Park View 1 Sassco.co.uk 2.
Dixon, the man, the myth, the miracle, grabs both goals in a superb performance.

I was making the observation that one of the last times we played on this pitch, Dixon fired in a hat-trick within about ten minutes, destroying our opponents on the day in an eventual 8-3 victory. That was back in the heady days of 2003 when we boasted a dream team of Wardle, Jiff Dickinson, Phil McNerney, Greenwell and, err, Muers amongst others. Yet not long after this thrilling display, he stepped in some dog shit at Ryhope and has been hit and miss since.

Today, he came back here and conquered, subsequently saving Sassco the headache of having to compensate for the misfiring, ballooned shots from Cresswell's.

We were spectacularly depleted. Gav Brown, Andy Farrer, Dave Graham, Mark Middlemiss and Josh Lay were all missing from the squad, which meant a second consecutive showing for Anth Pearson and also Jamie Wilson drafted back in for his first game since October 2007. I expected a decent performance after the last game and we certainly got it in the first half.

Some exceptional simple passing leading to a number of chances. Anth Pearson nodded on to the Crossbar, Swinhoe missed a good follow up, Cressy's shots were getting closer. Dave Gourlay saw the ball smothered by the 'keeper as he tried to round him. But it was work form Cresswell and Pearson on the left hand side which saw Dixon's quiff latch on to the ball and then into the back of the net. Truly unstoppable. I expected more, but they didn't come. We kept making unenforced errors which led to the some close shaves. Simma pulled us out of the mire on some occasions. Most were clearly things we could have dealt with. A simple stray pass results in a corner against us against a massive Park View team. The second goal did come in the second half. A looping effort from Dixon which saw the keeper stranded. 2-0 and two from Dixon. Definitely need to test his piss after the games from now on as something was definitely amiss.

It was then when we took our foot off the pedal and nearly gave it away. Jamie and Muers leapt for high ball with Jamie claiming it. At the sidelines I was yelling at one of the to drop. But Muers being Muers also jumped for it saying he was in front of Jamie (Cressy later stated that it was his gut which was in front of Jamie). So, you know what happened next - both missed it and their player had a clear run on goal. 2-1 and I expected a cave in. It nearly happened, but we seemed to ride it out. Main problem was players not clearing at the back and waiting for bounce. At the other end we had loads of chances. Cressy was now ballooning the shots despite having time. Digga had a great free-kick at their 'keeper and some of the shots were generally weak. The midfield was Gourlay, McDermont and Tim holding. They coped well. Macca had a very good game and was probably unfortunate not to score. Gourlay seemed to get plenty of space in a packed middle. Tim didn't get picked on today and even managed to sky a Muers style shot when through on goal.

Anth Pearson also had a decent game. His touch let him down in the attacking third now and then, but he attacked more in the second half. Swinhoe struggled a bit, but that was quite obvious because he was isolated in the 4-5-1. Normally with Dave Graham in the side, we seemed to attack more. And looking at this game from the sidelines, there was a huge space between Swinhoe and everybody else. He was on his last man as instructed, but we didn't have the legs to chase him up.

At the back, it was precarious at times. People weren't getting goalside or man to man. Jamie had a great game coming back from a long time off, while Muers was reasonably commanding. Sometimes we over elaborate. At the back and the front, when at times a boot through the ball is needed. Si was comfortable at right back despite overhitting some passes with his obscenely expensive football boots.

Silksworth Sports Complex
League Division 1
Park View 1
Sassco.co.uk 3 Chris Dixon 2
Sassco.co.uk: Dave Simpson, Simon Mulvaney, Mark Muers, Jamie Wilson, Chris Dixon*, Anthony Pearson, Tim Gillespie, Mark Cresswell, Dave Gourlay, Andy Swinhoe, Marc McDermont.

Sassco 11-a-side Tour to Cyprus 2008.
Click here for more detailed info.

The tour is back on. I'm looking to revive the Cyprus tour for October / November 2008. Full payment would be due around August time, but I want to put in that all deposits must be in by 31st May 2008.

The deposit is to be £100 (due 1st June 2008).

As mentioned before, it's for a one week Sassco 11-a-side tour to Cyprus. The tour is open to anyone also involved in the 6-a-side. It was halted last time due to the fact that so many players left the side during the Summer. We actually got 10 definites, but I wanted a minimum of 14 there, which is why it was called off. The next plan was for February 2008, but that was too close after Christmas when everyone was out of pocket.

The flights will be from Newcastle to Larnaca in October / November 2008 (one week tour) and the full price is as follows

£395.00 to £445.00 per person

Sassco.co.uk 3 Hylton CW 3.
Stubborn performance as a weary Swinhoe grabs two goals.

A surprisingly good performance against a strong side, despite being a "backs to the wall" situation for large portions of the game. We had a squad scare early on with both Andy Farrer and Gavin Brown being unavailable, then Marc McDermont missing not long before the kick off time. We were okay though. Poor Anth Pearson, still begging to play against a mingin team, was forced in at left back against one of the stronger sides. Butterman's troops suffered a heavy cup defeat last week, albeit with a weakened side, but this week seemed full strength.

We actually opened the scoring in the game. Catching them on the break, Marky Mark raced in and his shot struck the post. Swinhoe was on hand to scoop the ball into the back of the near empty net. Hylton CW pressured and an eventual equaliser came from a penalty "conceded" by Dixon. He was adamant he hadn't but Chris Martin fired in the equaliser. The second goal was a well worked goal. No one put any pressure on their side from the middle of the park, which resulted in the crossbar being rattled and Hylton CW on hand for the reply. By this time, poor Marky Mark was literally shedding blood for the cause as a swung arm (probably accidental) caught him on the hooter which, as it gushed blood, means I have to go to fifty degrees with shit loads of pre-wash to get his lifeblood off it. Marky had a superb game, just like his second half against the Cavalier. He drove at the opposition defence as public transport seems to have done him the world of good.

By now (in the second half) we were struggling physically, Swinhoe was on his last legs and told me to be ready to come on. I was pretty shocked that he even dared contemplate it. For the second, we seemed to actually up a gear a bit. Swin was on the last man, while Cressy was farmed out wide. It seemed to be a better combination and the level of chances we had in the second increased. Got to be honest though and say that CW definitely had the lions share of the chances. We kept giving deadball situations away and they were causing havoc on their right hand side against poor Anth Pearson, who actually had a solid game, being one of our more taller players.

It was a breakaway which gained us the equaliser. Cressy, almost the same as last week against the Cavalier, picked the ball up just outside the half and proceeded to beat at least three men before firing through their 'keeper. A major strike at the heart of their defence who easily coped with anything in the air, but struggled when the ball was down. Not long after this, we gained some breathing space. I can't exactly remember who it was (Cressy, Marky or Dave Graham), but the resultant pass saw Swinhoe fire in at the target to get it to 3-2. We used the ball wisely and tried to take advantage of the immense pace from Cressy, Swinhoe and Marky Mark. There were a number of times when a long, split ball was cut out by their defence. We were also caught offside quite a bit (well, Cressy was).

We were on the up. We had opportunities. Most of the time, we didn't really get the ball forward when we should have. We held on to it too much. Cressy fired in a cross directly to Tommy McHenry in their goal. We had at least two clear in the box. Dave Graham almost reached the ball before the aforementioned Henry in a another opportunity. And then Marky ballooned it wide when the keeper was out of position. All the chances were squandered against a good side and we were punished for it. Their right winger outsmarted both Tiger Tim and Anth P (I'm sure all three were playing "tig"), to pop the ball onto the head of Chris Martin as he headed their equaliser. There were a good few minutes left and right at the death, Simma pulled off the "Save of the Century" as he palmed away a header just prior to the whistle blowing. An act which earned him the Man-of-the-Match award.

So, quite a good result for us. We lost narrowly 2-1 in our last game against CW, but ironically, we played better on that day. While today, we were up against it and were a bit more clinical. Everyone actually played very well. The defence coped well against a very tall side, while both Dave Graham and Gourlay battled for the ninety minutes. Tim was being picked on again because they don't like his posh sort round these parts, but held his role well, and both wingers, plus the attackers, produced the goods when needed.

Cressy's been demanding that there are more photos of him on the site so he can show off to the lasses. I've tried my best, but most are of him holding his heads in his hands or loitering with hands on hips.

Downhill Complex
League Division 1
Sassco.co.uk 3 Mark Cresswell, Andy Swinhoe 2
Hylton CW 3
Sassco.co.uk: Dave Simpson*, Simon Mulvaney, Mark Muers, Chris Dixon, Anthony Pearson, Tim Gillespie, Mark Cresswell, Dave Gourlay, Andy Swinhoe, Mark Middlemiss, Dave Graham.

Sassco.co.uk 4 The Cavalier 2.
Pulsating second half comeback.

As everyone trudged off at half time, I was ready to echo my words from last week - "rubbish."

We took the lead from Dave Gourlay, but scary defending saw the team, which is suffering a major meltdown, concede a very poor equaliser. We had chances to clear, but failed to do so. It was even worse when Cavalier took the lead. The backline stopped, claiming offside, and could only watch as the Cavalier striker made no mistake. Time and time again I've told them to get goalside, get deep and use their skill and ability to win the ball back - not the referee's whistle.

For the team I had the formation as 4-4-2. It was the same side as was in the debacle against Usworth, but Dave Graham was back and popped into midfield as Anth Pearson wasn't there. Tim and Mark Middlemiss were on the bench as we had a full team out there for the first time since before the Winter Break. 4-4-2 completely failed. Gourlay and Graham were struggling to get back and forth and despite having Swinhoe and Cressy - both lethal marksman, they simply didn't perform together. So it had to be back to 4-5-1 with players shuffling around. The main change was that Mark Middlemiss was on the right while Tim was holding. Swinhoe came off and Macca was due off as well, but Andy Farrer signalled an injury. For the first half, I had Emu on the wing. He was diabolical, so immediately shifted back in as centre half. I didn't really have to scream and shout at the players at the interval - they did it themselves. Sassco knew they were playing shockingly bad football and the second half needed a massive turnaround.

The second half was a transformation. 4-5-1 worked. Both DG's were liberated as Tim was doing all the dirty work. We played some great short passing, patient stuff. Most of it was at the back and didn't really cause many problems for the Cavalier who were content to leave us at it, but it boosted our confidence up and we tended to quicken the passing the closer we got to their area. We had some cracking chances. Dave Graham missed an open goal as he sliced it wide, but soon after stuck a stunning shot which cannoned off the crossbar and post. I had my head in my hands for a prolonged period and expected the sucker punch from Cavalier as they'd done so well in the first. But then up popped Cresswell, now featuring as a lone forward. He picked up the ball from the third of the field and beat two or three men (including one who'd gone in hard on him moments earlier) before lashing it through the 'keeper to make it 2-2. I urged everyone to pressurise the Cavalier as this was definitely our time, and from kick off, we won it back again and Cressy struck a clean shot to make it 3-2. Excellent stuff. We had a good few chances after this. The scariest one was when, I think it was Cressy or Dave Graham, struck the post (or was it their lad clearing the ball) and the rebound from Gav Brown was cleared off the line. Immediately at the other end, Cavalier had a free-kick from Muer's dwelling on the ball too much and giving away a foul (disputed, but should have been cleared earlier). We packed our own goalmouth and Simma palmed the ball away from a well struck free kick. A break on at the other end saw Marky Mark clean through. He ran from deep so probably wasn't offside, but then just as we expected the miss, he somehow scooped the ball into the back of the net as he was tackled. 4-2 and a great second half.

It's quite obvious that the form of the team has dipped considerably. We've peaked early in our two games before Christmas and need to get things back on track. Positives were an excellent second half, including an almost full squad. It was good to see everyone back, even if Dave Graham and Si Mulvaney looked like they were dressed for a Village People tribute act when they turned up. A very strong and difficult game next week against Hylton CW at home. We're in 5th position as it stands and based on the mediocre performances, anything higher than that would be a bonus. Also, Cressy and Macca need to get the £2 subs to me or Muers before next weeks game.

Downhill Complex
League Division 1
Sassco.co.uk 4 Mark Cresswell 2, Dave Gourlay, Mark Middlemiss
The Cavalier 2
Sassco.co.uk: Dave Simpson, Simon Mulvaney, Mark Muers, Marc McDermont, Chris Dixon, Andy Farrer (Tim Gillespie), Gavin Brown, Mark Cresswell, Dave Gourlay*, Andy Swinhoe (Mark Middlemiss), Dave Graham.

Usworth FC 4 Sassco.co.uk 1.
Complete and utter rubbish.

No other words for it other than "rubbish."

Once again, Sassco wilt under a bit of pressure. We knew we were climbing the table, but like last year, in January, we failed miserably and succumbed to a heavy defeat.

Ironically, Simma and Swin were due to miss this one. I was squabbling around for a goalkeeper and was resigned to the fact that Emu would be in between the sticks (Gav Kershaw's fractured his foot). However, about sixish last night, just when I was scribbling a few random swearwords to direct at Emu when in goal, Simma and Swinhoe confirmed that they'd be there. After it, they probably wish they hadn't. Not much positive to say about today. I nearly got stuck in a tree when retrieving a ball and came on for Gav Brown late in the second. We were 4-0 down at the time and eventually did get a consolation. It was too late and this time we didn't even deserve that.

Looking back at it, it's quite clear that we are going to struggle when we miss a few players. Saying that, the squad we had today was well and truly good enough. The system was probably flawed. We were missing three key midfielder's, Mark Middlemiss, Dave Graham and Tim Gillespie, but I still decided to play 4-5-1. However, we seemed to give the goals away. I can't remember Simma having to make any other saves apart from the goals conceded, but Usworth were clinical in taking their chances. We were left chasing the game after conceding the first one, which was a long ball from the right hand side after we'd had the better of the first ten minutes. The Usworth player had time to side step our defender (can't remember who it was) and score. 1-0, but all wasn't lost until Macca pushed a player from behind in a very dangerous area just outside the box. The free kick was blasted with some force to make it 2-0. At this time I'd already decided to change it to 4-4-2 for the second half and expected a good comeback at 2-0 down. But as three minutes were remaining on the clock, Digga decided to dwell on the ball too much and saw it stolen before ending up in the back of the net. Truly criminal. I hope you're thinking about it on the long journey back home in your working man's sports car

By far, the worst performance from Sassco for a good while. We just can't seem to cope with Usworth. They'd beaten us 4-1 in the League in our home game. Once the opener went in, we looked deflated and didn't really create anything. Second half saw an up in our performance, but their first chance in the second led to another goal. Macca got his first goal for Sassco as he replaced Gav Brown on the wing (I was on as left back), but generally everything was bad, really bad.

The players seem to have lost all confidence in the system. Swinhoe, who thrived in the 4-5-1 setup seems to be a pale shadow of himself. Cresswell struggled all game. Despite having the ball at his feet, he kept getting tackled and frustrated. Si and Gourlay were centre midfield and did okay on the ball, but the balance wasn't there. Digga, apart from his mistake, played quite well. I'll have to adapt the team to the system from now on. When the missing lads are all there, 4-5-1 is the way to go, but when one or two are missing, we need to adapt and get back to 4-4-2. It's good we can play both ways though. Now that we have two strikers in Cresswell and Swinhoe, the 4-4-2 is probably more ideal. Remember that I was forced into 4-5-1 as we only had Swinhoe as an attacker. Today in the first, I had a left winger on the left wing and a left winger on the right - not good, reeks of Steve McLaren's bong eyed pegs in bong eyed wholes. This is no fluke result. As mentioned Usworth beat us 4-1 at home in what I'd call our last low point.

Just have to write it off and plug away next week. The missing players should be back and are likely to jump straight in the side.

Plesseys
League Division 1
Usworth FC 4
Sassco.co.uk 1 Marc McDermont
Sassco.co.uk: Dave Simpson, Anthony Pearson, Simon Mulvaney, Mark Muers, Marc McDermont, Chris Dixon, Andy Farrer, Gavin Brown (Davinder Sangha), Mark Cresswell, Dave Gourlay, Andy Swinhoe

Sassco.co.uk 1 Cambridge Hotel 0.
Dave Gourlay's late strike settles an insipid performance from Sassco.

Changes in the team structure led to Muers hounding the players for their £2 subs. It's Pizza night for him every Saturday now that he's the Team Treasurer. Brian Watson also came in as Team Secretary for his first view of Sassco. I was slightly worried that the referee would query the pitch. Ironically, Redhouse FC's pitch was horrendously unplayable. All you could see was a massive brown patch all over the pitch. Look at the photo above and you can see the Redhouse pitch in the background. Our's was okay. It was definitely going to cut up, but it was playable.

Cambridge were the opponents. I expected a win, but unlike last season where we gained two memorable wins, this time, Cambridge didn't seem to be as strong. We did get the win, but it was a late one and I seem to remember holding my head in my hands for the last twenty minutes. We were eventually liberated by Dave Gourlay's late, late strike which gained an enormous cheer from our sidelines as we constantly pressed in the latter stages. Cambridge gave us a few scares, but on the balance of player, we deserved it. Despite the win, this wasn't really good enough. The team was virtually full-strength with only Dave Graham dropping out due to injury. Against my better nature, I stuck to the 4-4-2 from the second half of the last game. We're lucky we got away with it. It's going to be back to 4-5-1 next week, as we really didn't get out of the blocks for this one.

Saying that, as mentioned, we were the better side overall. We had lots of chances, but squandered most with poorly hit shots and balls flying wide. We just couldn't keep hold of the ball well enough as well. Countless times we won it and then lost it within the next move. First half saw opportunities missed and at 0-0, it wasn't really a pleasant start to our League campaign in 2008.

I made two changes early in the second half. Farrer came on for Dixon, while Bri Marley replaced Josh Lay on the left wing. It was probably a coincidence, but the team looked more likely to score in the second. We were camped in their half and most of the shots went wide. Lack of composure was the main cause.

With around two minutes remaining, Dave Gourlay turned inside the box and lashed in the only goal of the game. A great goal to settle a dull game - watched for the first time by our new Team Secretary.

Great on Barry Poulton, the referee. When some of the Cambridge lads were whinging about the Sassco ball, he had a quick bounce, said it was fine and continued the game. Well done.

Away to Usworth next week at Plesseys (Sunderland Aircraft Museum). There's no referee arranged for it at the moment.

A note about the website. It ALWAYS get's updated within two or three hours of the game, so press CTRL and F5 to refresh and update the page if you keep on seeing the old one.

Downhill Complex
League Division 1
Sassco.co.uk 1 Dave Gourlay
Cambridge Hotel 0
Sassco.co.uk: Dave Simpson, Simon Mulvaney, Mark Muers, Marc McDermont, Chris Dixon (Andy Farrer), Tim Gillespie, Mark Middlemiss, Mark Cresswell, Josh Lay (Brian Marley), Dave Gourlay, Andy Swinhoe.