Another average season from Sassco, blighted by inconsistency. Unlike previous seasons, this campaign saw some heavy defeats against teams, transformed by handsome wins or, at least, massive improvements in results and performances over the same teams and superior teams a few weeks later.

The pre-season programme was full again; totalling nine games against teams who were in stronger leagues. The team were donning a new jersey and had secured another new sponsor in iKobo, a finance company based in Atlanta, Georgia and also Florida. The players added were returns for Wayne Greenwell, with Neil Richardson coming in for pre-season games (due to a competitive ban) as well as Paul McConville as a non-regular player. Gareth Stoker came in for a centre half berth. Andy Swinhoe also made a return as a regular player along with Mickey Pearson. And Stephen Lewis also returned after warming Redhouse FC’s bench. A unique feature seems to be past Sassco players wanting to return. On the opposite end, Andy Farrer, Andy Reay with Gav Brown were all gone. Also missing was Mark Middlemiss, albeit for a few returns. Jamie Wilson was also absent apart from a solitary appearance.

So, unlike last pre-season, the team was reasonably set for the marathon of games on artificial turfs in and around the region. A heavy hammering off Shildon was one of the notable ones. But battling performances against Rutherford AFC, Redhouse FC and Sunderland South were augmented with excellent wins over Washington Colliery, Whitley Bay Deaf and Forest Hall FC.

The most devastating defeat was actually the 11-a-side team losing to a Sassco B team, cobbled together with ex-players and player from the Sassco leagues. The poor A v B defeat helped in our first game, as confidence was questioned. Sassco blitzed Park View 8-0 away from home. However, after this, we had a poor game at Hylton CW with a depleted team and a 3-1 defeat. The big disaster came away to Sporting Redhouse with a heavy defeat, despite leading. This was mainly due to sending offs, substitutions and injuries, as the team only had nine fit players for the majority of the second half.

After this it was a record win against Sportsmans Arms (a team later removed from the League), with Steve Stubbs making a return. And then the best so far in the Cup against Blue Bell (3-1). Overconfidence nearly led to a home defeat against Traveller’s, but the team 2-0 down and 3-2 down clawed it back to 3-3 (with Lewis scoring two comeback goals).

By now, the team was suffering it’s typical share of player losses. Lewis became disillusioned again and vanished from view. Gareth Stoker was banned for several games. Critically, Dave Graham was missing more and more, and we didn’t have a ready placed replacement.

Then, in November, it was the logistically successful Malta Trip. Three games in three days fulfilled one of the many ambitions I had for Sassco. The results were three expected defeats, but overall the tour was so successful that a Portugal Tour is to take place in October 2009. Dave Gourlay was appointed as Team Coach for the tour and the system seemed to work, so he was appointed on a full-time basis, with myself being solely in charge of bringing together the best 14 players for Gourlay to work with.

Coming back from Malta, the team was caught cold in an away game to Seaham as Cresswell was poached by Hylton Castle (finally). It was then that I called on Jimmy Raeper to return. Craig Charlton also heard about it and requested to join. Charlie transferred from Redhouse and Jimmy came in for the final games in 2008. However, they joined at a poor time. Player shortages starting to occur and we played several important games with what I would call a second string side, or the bare eleven. I started making appearances which is a clear sign of something going wrong.

The Seaham defeat was followed by a heavy Cup defeat to Mountain Daisy in appalling, freezing weather. Pearson also left the team as a regular player.

A mid season game took place against Ovi’s disorganised NaSA team. An easy  win with Raeper and Charlton featuring. This led to a full team easily defeating travellers 4-2 in a Cup Competition. This was followed by a lucky 1-1 draw at home to Cambridge Hotel and a 6-3 win over Times Inn, which saw Anthony Pearson grab a hat-trick in front of the cameras. The games against Sportman’s, Traveller’s and Times Inn were captured on video (available in the Media section) as well as the complete Malta Tour. Back to reality, a good January, which is traditionally poor for Sassco, was followed by a disastrous February.

It was after Christmas when the real problems started occurring. Cresswell leaving left a bit of a void. Also, Stephen Lewis, who re-joined with such fanfare went missing – mainly down to work issues, but probably due to the fact that he wasn’t given the red carpet treatment and seemed to be jealous of Dave Gourlay for some apparent reason.

With the poor weather, several games were called off, thus creating a backlog.

Two heavy defeat in February with depleted sides (1-5 v Hyltion and 1-8 v Colonel Prior – both in the Cup), saw Craig Charlton leave the team (again), but Brian Marley and Andy Farrer making emergency appearances, along with Neil Richardson, due to his ban being lifted. An important win, 3-1 away to Cambridge (which saw Swinhoe playing his last game) revitalised the side, but another setback saw Travellers defeat Sassco, 5-2 away, with Steve Conlin making his first appearance; sourced by Jimmy. A poor squad saw Sassco lose at home to  the Seaham Times Inn, and it was obvious changes needed to be made.

The form was upturned and the best came with 4-1 home win over Usworth, with Kyle Robinson shocking the footballing world by making a return with Sassco. He was sold on the fake club vision by McDermont and this seemed to settle the squad. By this time, Dave Graham’s appearances were limited, Tim failed to show for several games and Stoker was banned again. In the Usworth game Rikki Kennedy made his debut, and Dave Simpson saved his first ever penalty with the scored tied at 1-1. However, the most important result in terms of a watershed moment came after a chaotic midweek 10-0 defeat to Hylton. This was after a superb 2-2 draw v runaway leaders, Sporting (when 2-0 down). This heavy defeat resulted in Dave Gourlay stepping down as Team Coach. I returned as Interim coach (with a 3-2 away win over Usworth) before making a controversial appointment of Neil Richardson as Team Coach (initially until the end of the season). Marc McDermont was also ejected from the team, but apologised and made a return.

However, for Richardson; his first task was to mould the weakest possible Sassco team on a Wednesday evening against The Fort, a team unbeaten in several games. Greenwell, due to the heavy midweek defeat and complaints about Neil Richardson refused to play for him and demanded a change (despite being aware of the change the night before). But Sangha backed his Coach and Greenwell was removed from the team five minutes before kick off. The ten men made a brave stand to gain a 2-2 draw against The Fort. Greenwell was told to apologise to Neil Richardson (his Team Coach) and the team, if he wanted to come back. The Sassco management always stand their ground and the majority of the players had a “stick two fingers up at Greenwell” attitude and were pleased he had left.

After this, things went on the up. Both McConville and Pearson made more regular appearances and we weren’t short for the rest of the season. A win over Country Park Inn was followed by a best performance away to the Fort (6-4). However, it all collapsed when a full and overconfident team were defeated 4-3 by the bottom team and everyone turned on the stubborn Nelly in the changing rooms. I then made the decision to take control of the team again. Nelly obviously wanted better players so he was hampered with the squad chosen for him. However, I didn’t want to change things, so decided that it’s best I pick the squad and the team.

We defeated Park View 3-0, with a wonder goal from Dave Graham, who spent the rest of the half asking people if they wanted his autograph. Then a midweek performance v Hylton CW was vastly improved despite a first half 2-0 deficit. Sassco dominated the second half but failed to score despite at least a dozen good chances.

The final game saw a reasonably full complement easily beat Country Park Inn, with a staggering four goals from Jimmy. The end of season enjoyment was somewhat lowered by Brian Watson’s announcement that he had to stand down as Team Sec. due to other commitments.

Marc McDermont headed the goal scoring list with twelve goals, but Jimmy was close behind him. Gareth Stoker was voted Player of the Season with 8 votes, which is 38%. Dave Gourlay, winner every year since 2005, got 5 votes, which is 24%.

Other things of note were that we had our Charter Standard award renewed. Sponsorship was also renewed and a new away kit was obtained. The website is still gaining many visitors and players seem to want to play for Sassco. A prime example being David “Bunta” Murton, who returns on a temporary two month contract before he vanishes again.

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Greenwell’s return marred by an expected defeat.

Two games were actually played. The first was a standard 45 minute each way game, ending in a 5-0 defeat, while the second one was a mini-game played due to the extra time available on the pitch. The second game ended in a 1-0 defeat.

Bit chaotic at the start. We turned up at Coach Lane, the same place where we have two memorable wins over Forest Hall over the last two summers, but found out that it was a different pitch; a school pitch further up Coach Lane. Several detours and mis-directions later, we hustled together and Greenwell, unlike the meticulous Pearson before him, failed to have any sort of line up ready. It was done on the back of a piece of scrap paper with five minutes to kick off. Then, having several substitutes, Macca left the bench seat at the Northumbria University changing room, so I had to go back for it.

Just as I was returning to the car park, I saw Chemfica’s first goal slot past Dave Smith, who turned up unannounced. Most of the players’ jaws dropped when I told them that Chemfica were a Northern Alliance side, similar to Newcastle BT, who offered us a similar thrashing last summer. However, it wasn’t all that bad. We were doing roll-on, roll-off, which doesn’t help, but remained reasonably stubborn. The half-time result was 2-0, but the floodgates opened in the second half and Chemfica ran up a 5-0 scoreline.

We had our usual expected whingers, with McDermont supposedly injured after five minutes. Obviously he didn’t fancy it and spent the first half moaning about other players on the bench. Here’s a moan for you, Mac: If you don’t fancy it – f**k off.

Lee Ramsay was probably our best player on the afternoon, but we were playing a strong team, so can’t be too disheartened.

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Another defeat for the “A” team.

Firstly, thanks to Dave Smith and Scott Smith for arranging the extra players: Simon Graney, Liam Murray, Nick Danks and Dan Young. Also, thanks to Greenwell for saying he’s going to turn up and actually turn up.

The so-called “B” team was as follows: Dave Simpson, Simon Graney, Liam Murray, Scott Smith, Chris Taylor, Nick Danks, Dan Young, Davinder Sangha (replaced by Wayne Greenwell), Michael Garrett, Wayne Ramsey, Stephen Conlin

Couldn’t really call them a “B” team as such, and more of a Sassco XI. The A team was as follows: Dave Smith, David Oxley, Mark Muers, Paul McConville, Chris Dixon, Dave Gourlay, Lee Ramsay, Callum Howe, Scott Hembrough, Dan Campbell, Anthony Pearson

We had various drop outs and a couple of no-shows. However, I was sort of prepared for this and made sure everyone attempted to bring one or two players.

Callum Howe opened the scoring as the “A” team were resplendent in the new shirts (sponsored by The Bunker), however it didn’t all go well. A resilient performance from the Sassco XI backline, with Scott Smith and Chris Taylor being outstanding, so them recover from the wind against them and the mini-onslaught. The first half remained at 1-0.

Second half saw a more sure performance from the XI, as they had several chances. Titch, having missed a first half sitter, clipped the crossbar and Greenwell hammered in the equaliser. More chances came and went, with Garrett and Wayne Ramsay having much improved second halves. Eventually the XI team went ahead when Simon Graney deftly chipped the ball over an advancing Dave Smith.

Somehow, the scoring ended there. XI were catching Sassco on the break, but at the other end, the team were camped in the XI penalty box. Shots were cleared off the line and Simpson made several spectacular saves to keep the second half scoresheet clean.

So, once again, the XI team defeated the first eleven. McDermont and Pearson were missing, but the “A” team had the advantage of having the prolific Scott Hembrough at the helm. Take him out of the equation and the XI team could have had a much more comfortable game.

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Sangha puts Sassco 3 points ahead. That’s all that matters.

Well would you believe it? Expecting a hammering, the brave Sassco bunch: Dave Smith, Dave Simpson, Mark Muers, Marc McDermont, myself (Davinder Sangha), plus Scott Hembrough, Paul “Tyson” Stokoe and the ever-reliable Wayne Greenwell, were holding out at 0-0, until I was placed clear outside the area to spring in a three pointer. It’s rare you hear the words, “Sangha grabs three for Sassco…”

Playing basketball was madness against an amateur, but genuine team, and, for once, it wasn’t my idea, it was Alan Hoyle’s idea, who runs Sassco Knightflyers. We’re returning the favour with an 11-a-side game in mid-June as well. A lot of people were interested in the basketball game, but I was pissed off that we had drop outs and expected only six there. It’s rare we can set events like this up, so if someone says they are okay for it, I expect them to. Not half-hearted replies. But, lucky for us, Tyson and Greenwell managed to bundle themselves along. Greenwell turned up for the cheerleaders, but I didn’t tell the pervert that they were aged between five and eight years old. He was gutted and decided to get kitted for the game. We were actually wearing the tops we are due to wear in Spain in October. I hastily heat glued the badges on, but Tyson’s came off as he cannot show any loyalty to Sassco.

Back to the game: After the opener, Simpson managed to get two points, but Knightflyers broke clear and secured more points. In the meanwhile, Tyson, with his own running commentary, managed to get points. Emu got a couple of three pointers, while Greenwell also did the same. Scotty H’s two points were the best. A sort of “back heel” with his hands. Macca got points, but threw the ball like a girl. I don’t think Dave Smith did as he was firing blanks.

It was confusing a bit. Shouts of “Muers, get your f**king foot through it!” as well as “Back post! Back post!” but overall it was astonishingly enjoyable. Looks like we know what sport we’ll take up when we all get banned.

The final score was 49 to Knightflyers and 29 to Sassco. Very impressive.

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Possibly the poorest Sassco season for a number of years, easily the most disappointing since we dropped out of the top division in 2005, without a single win to our name.

The pre-season was, as expected, quite busy, including trips a post season defeat to Redhouse FC by two goals to one in the AGUK Challenge Cup, a strong win on the Sandhill’s artificial turf against Thomas Wilson, before the team came unstuck on a Sunday morning with a surprise defeat to Leam Lane Rangers at Gateshead.This was followed with a tempestuous comeback win against Forest Hall, a massive victory over Rutherford Deaf and then a heavy defeats against West Auckland and Newcastle BT; both teams in higher levels than ourselves.

After ninety minutes of our opening game, it was obvious that the team had near-collapse. The 2-0 defeat against Cambridge was hard to bear, but the insolence of some key players, namely Stoker and Richardson, meant that I was forced to remove them from the squad. Both eventually returned, but the absence and the disarray saw a run of defeats.

We hadn’t won a single game against a decent team until we actually went to Portugal, where a memorable tour saw a win, a draw and a loss.

Back in the cold, the team suffered and Greenwell, who was appointed Coach, was ready to receive the axe, until a superb run saw the team unbeaten for several games. During this run, Greenwell suffered the “thumb” and was forced out of coaching the side, mainly due to lack of attention and interest. Michael Pearson was appointed in his stead, and kept the run going. However, as the player signing deadline approached, the team was hit with several injuries and hobbled over the finishing line with only five wins out of fourteen games in the new year.

A lot of soul searching during the summer months, but the advantage is that the team has an appointed coach for pre-season for the first time, who will bring his ideas in and look for reliable players to avoid some embarrassingly heavy defeats.

Leading scorer for the season was Mark Muers, who move from defence into attack, back into defence, then back into attack for the latter part of the season.

Overwhelming player nominated as the best Sassco player this season was goalkeeper, David Smith, who replaced Simpson (now outfield) and was a key figure in the long unbeaten run.

The post Season review. appeared first on Sassco.co.uk.

Revitalised performance.

After the midweek chaos, it was back to bare bones again and near panic as Titch decided to go camping two hours before kick off. I managed to get in a replacement against the table-toppers, Washington CC, and the performance was one of the best we’ve had.

A narrow defeat with Washington’s goal coming in the last five minutes, meant we left the field with nothing. But a makeshift side performed stubbornly, with excellent outings from Tim Gillespie, Dave Smith and also Mark Muers (heaven forbid), who scored Sassco’s second goal.

The whole day was nearly overshadowed by Wayne Greenwell’s reappearance as he dropped off his missing shirt and received the usual torrent of abuse from me (wonder why he left in the first place?).

Minor hiccup before kick-off. A pile of dog turd had to be removed from the pitch, so Greenwell was nominated and stood over it like a tool with a carrier bag before Mickey Pearson did the dirty deed.

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Mr Harper has always had his opinions. It was only fair to interview the “Tash” with some hard hitting questions.

Q) In your opinion, you said on many occasions that Sassco need to take the “next step.” However, General Manager, Sangha has always said that “he doesn’t take it too seriously.” and “can’t be arsed.” Has your opinion changed or if not, what comments do you have?

HARPER: My opinion hasn’t changed and will never change until you see the errors of your ways. You have a good but erratic side which has got to get that extra solidity to win things.

Q) You were a failed member of the Portugal Tour 2009, mainly with injury after deciding to jump into a swimming pool, an act Sangha described as “like someone hoying a house into a bath.” Were you very disappointed? Are you going to get into shape for the next tour? And were you bemused by the goings on in the tour, for example, 50% of the players stumbling into the hotel 6am on Sunday morning with an 11am kick off time for the final game.

HARPER: Yes I feel as I failed the lads and that is why my weight has gone down a stone* since coming back from Portugal. I will show certain people that I can play, or should I say consistently play at a level they are capable of, even at my age.

* Need to lose more than a stone…

Q) Manager Sangha traipsed a good few miles on the Sunday morning to get you a sandwich in Portugal, but you refused to eat it as it had tomatoes in. Do you regret this?

HARPER: No, I’d still say the same now.

Q) You played in Sassco’s first ever game. What do you think about the progress of the team itself. Sangha has always said that technically, the team has stood still for around five years, as shown by various league positions.

HARPER: The team has progressed hugely that is why they are ready to go out to win things with a few more gifted players and also to stop the moaning at each other, even from you Mr Sangha.

Q) You offered your services as Team Coach at the start of the season, but failed to show for many games, before the job was given to Greenwell. What were your reasons for being typically unreliable?

HARPER: Mainly the lack of team members who stuck together, you should have binned the rotten ones who were bringing the other down even if they are decent players. Also your unwillingness to let the squad get bigger so they had to fight for their places. You know my principles on this as much as anyone.

Q) The team still has a core root of players who originated in 2002; Sangha, Greenwell, Gourlay, Dixon, Pearson, Muers, with sporadic appearances from Stubbs and to a lesser extent, Wardle. All teams evolve, but Sangha tends to stay loyal to his regular, reliable players. Do you think this is a good thing or bad thing?

HARPER: I think it’s a great idea but you still haven’t brought the best out of these players purely by not taking them to the next level. That is what they want if you really asked them to be honest.

Q) You’ve said you’ve won plenty of trophies, etc. in the past, but there’s no documented proof of this, despite you saying you’d bring the evidence. What are your comments on this statement?

HARPER:  I won everything you can win at a local level at school and after school. Sunderland boys and County player, my trophies and medals at my mothers are still there along with my two County ties and four County cup winners medals. What actual proof are you after Dov and I’ll see what I can do.*

* Photos on Facebook.

Q) Who, in your opinion, are the current key players for Sassco.co.uk, and who are the poor additions?

HARPER: Good additions, Gourlay, Smith, Greenwell, Muers and Pearson, they all have given a hell of alot for the cause on the field. Poor additions are the people who have attitude problems or believe they are better than they really are. You know exactly who I’m talking about*.

* No I don’t. Please specify.

All in all Dov they are a great bunch of lads with some brilliant characters to boot but it still doesn’t stop the fact that you and selected others deserve more than you have actually achieved.

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In the first of a series of interviews, Michael Pearson, a long standing, original member of the team, now Assistant Coach, answers some in-depth questions.

Michael was selected by General Manager, Davinder Sangha, to join the team back in it’s debut game in 2002 and has remained a regular player in recent years, having been non-regular during the mid-years. And he was recently appointed as Assistant Coach to the team.

Q) William Harper, in one of his many outlandish, Pele type claims, once considered you “the best young player in Sunderland.” Do you think this has put pressure on you?

PEARSON: As we all know, William “Tash” Harper has a vast amount of experience and is very knowledgeable when it comes to football. Some might say he even played like Pele in his younger days. So when someone like that makes such a statement about a young player it does place a bit of pressure on a young person’s shoulders. Part of being a footballer is about learning to handle such pressures and I feel I owe a lot to Sassco General Manager, Davinder Sangha, for helping me to develop myself further, not just as a player but also as a person.

Q) You stopped playing for Sassco in the Saturday morning Tyne & Wear League after criticising the team heavily in the press. Manager, Sangha, once famously said, “If there was a Hell, it would have to freeze over” before considering you for the team again. Yet you came back. How do you feel the team has developed, as you are one of the original players?

PEARSON: Sassco originally started out with, on paper, a strong looking squad that could challenge for honours but after a poor start in the TW League things went tits up. Internal bickering between players and management alike looked like Sassco would be another one season team. Somehow, Sassco managed to keep on going for a few seasons but the same problems arose season after season and I became a bit of a non – regular. Sassco have never managed to sustain a settled consistent squad and have had many different coaches* giving it a go with very little success.

However, this season has seen a remarkable change in fortunes for this Sassco squad. Gone are the players who some might say caused problems and in came a few new and old faces. The managerial team has seen yet another change but this time has proved successful…so far.

Being an original member of the Sassco brand from the very first day I have seen many good, bad and very humorous times as well as many, many…many players come and go but I can now see that the team is now realising its true potential. On the field the team is beginning to play consistently well and have had some excellent results so far this season and can hopefully build on that.

Off the field Sassco is one the most organised and well ran clubs in local football. No one can argue with that. Everything from the superb website, trips abroad and links with various north east clubs and it is all down to Dov. He might not have the tactical nous to change a game but he can certainly make the Sassco brand bigger and better.

* Coaches since 2002 have been: Davinder Sangha (several long spells and various interim roles), Dave Watson, Dave Gourlay, Neil Richardson, William Harper and Wayne Greenwell.

Q) Its common knowledge that once you’re in a relationship with a girl, your football career effectively ends. What are your comments on this?

PEARSON: When I have stopped playing for Sassco previously it was down to a number of factors. I don’t want to dwell on the past, I just want to look to the future and drive Sassco forward. I take my role with the club very seriously.

Q) How do you feel about having your brother, Anthony, in the team?

PEARSON: I think it’s great to have young talent in the team. I feel he fits in very well into the way we play and has made the left hand side of midfield his own by being in excellent form recently, scoring 5 goals in his last 6 appearances.  Obviously with him being my brother and me being part of the managerial team some might expect favouritism but I would like to go on record to say I am his biggest critic and we often have many disagreements with how we rate each other’s performances in games. No player is favoured more than others. Each game a team is picked that we think can win.

Q) Its quite obvious that General Manager, Davinder Sangha, considers you the true power behind Greenwell’s throne (you are currently classed as Assistant Coach) and Sangha has on several occasions attempted to undermine Greenwell with undue pressure and also a whispering campaign to install you as Team Coach. Do you think this is a good or bad thing and what are your comments on the situation?

PEARSON: Greenwell and I are working hard to make Sassco a force to be reckoned with and part of that is to make the squad a strong unit with a united team spirit and any whisper campaigns will undermine our hard work. After our recent run of form I feel as if the management team has answered their critics. Hopefully everyone squad member is on the same page now and we can continue to build on our form going into the New Year. We have competition for places now which is something we have never had before. Times ahead look bright for Sassco and I look forward working alongside Greenwell and hopefully take Sassco onto the next level.

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Apart from his goal, Emu did f**k all and now owes £24 to Durham FA.

Pearson opened the scoring but I was bricking it as the nice white shirts we were wearing were getting dirtier. I rode over Greenwell and Pearson’s instructions for the second half to get stuck in, by asking the team to avoid any sliding tackles or diving headers, as I’ll have to bump the machine up to 50 degrees, along with a pre-wash and a super-rinse. No doubt I’ll have to spray some pre-wash on and reckon it’s going to take at least two washes. Not good. Not good at all.

Anyhow, back to the game. Pearson opened the scoring with an excellent goal as we seemed to be under pressure. Nevertheless, we soon went 2-0 up when Langan scored a superb goal. Everytime we seemed to attack, we looked as if we’d get a goal. Dave Gourlay’s shot squirmed wide and I’m not sure what Mark Muers was doing. His shot also went wide.

2-0 at half time and we knew it was going to be difficult. The pitch was a quagmire by now and Country Park Inn, who also featured one of our ex’s, Mark Sammut, broke the fragile offside trap to reduce the deficit. They did have the upper hand, but eventually, as time wore on with around fifteen minutes remaining, Muers broke clear and used whatever comedy pace he had to secure the decisive goal. Up until that point, he was wallowing around in the mud like a hippo with an Adidas shirt on.

Greenwell got one right in the balls late on. Everyone was looking at the sidelines expecting me to do something. I just suggested I call his new girlfriend and tell her everything’s off, as he hobbled off the pitch, to be replaced by me. I went up front and spent the last ten minutes trying to navigate my way through the mire and at the same time keeping my shirt clean.

Discipline problems again. Muers, Langan and Pearson were all yellow carded. Also, Langan and Pearson are in arrears for £4 each and need to clear this before being eligible to play again. Mickey Pea’s been using the oldest trick in the book, by telling Emu that he pays me on Tuesdays. Muers not realising that I haven’t seen Pearson on a Tuesday for around three months.

The general discussion after the game was that it was a difficult game, but Dave Smith didn’t really have many chances to save. The ones he did – he did well. Our fourth win on the trot. To view the up-to-date table, bypass the one on this site and go directly to the WCFL.org.uk site.

The other thing of note was that, hypothetically, if me and Muers had a love child, we reckoned that he’d look like Wes Brown.

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Muer’s gets a hat-trick, but Pearson persuades Park View to give the Man-of-the-match to Langan.

Yes, we may have our fancy website; the best around. We do have our over ambitious, but still successful, tours overseas and we may be kitted out in the finest custom gear, including footballs, as well as being uniquely Adidas long before they started releasing kits in the UK. But we always remember our level, which is the lowest amateur level available to adults. This is something that Park View failed to get in their heads when the game was struggling for a referee. We tried long and hard to get a stand-in referee, with no luck.

Eventually it was decided that me, Brian Watson or Greenwell would have the honours. Spanner in the works when Park View refused to play under these circumstances. Pissed me off no end. What other reasons would a team at this level use? No clean running water, no room for spectators in the stands? To much dog turd on the pitch (apart from the players)? It’s quite obvious that I don’t give a hoot about health and safety. We need to look at the level we are at. If we have to ram two posts into either end of a pitch and run a string along the top, then that’s good enough for me.

In the event, Peter Maguire managed to get a referee in, so my rant above was wasted.

Park View had been a problematic side for us in the past, but they were a pale shadow of the team from a few seasons back. The much maligned and diseased Muers put Sassco 1-0 ahead, before his equally rotund partner, Langan, made it 2-0. Greenwell was absent due to work, so Michael Pearson picked the team in a 3-5-2 formation (the inset video shows the beginnings of his historic team talk). It worked, but both wing-backs, Dixon and Pea, struggled, so it was reverted to 4-4-2 when Park View came back strongly.

Second half saw Greenwell turn up and replace Dixon, who spent the second half slagging off Anth Pearson (until he scored). By this time we were 3-0 ahead from Muers before they pulled one back. It didn’t cause us any problems as we ran out 7-2 winners. Muers scored three. Langan scored two, while Stoker and Anth Pearson scored the others. Stoker actually provided a running commentary during the penultimate goal, calling everyone “paedo’s”, “kiddy fiddlers” and “fat c**ts.” Tourettes well and truly in force.

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